Posted by Helen on: 06.12.2006 /
I went to the church where I’m still a member (my membership status is ‘inactive’). I hadn’t been to a service there since last September. (Or to any service except for one church visit with relatives a couple of weeks ago)
I went because I wanted to meet Andrew Marin. I’d looked up his website on Saturday after hearing he’d be at the church yesterday. I liked what I saw enough to consider actually going to church yesterday so I could meet him.
(By the way, I thought about going to see Hemant at Parkview CC but I couldn’t take time to drive that far this morning)
I couldn’t sneak in. I saw several people I knew, who each made a big deal about being pleased to see me there. That was nice. I told them all I was just visiting – I didn’t want them to assume they’d be seeing me every week again.
I was glad to meet Andrew Marin. Two pastors were around when I talked with him and they shook my hand and were friendly. I didn’t see the pastor I spoke with in April at all this morning.
It went ok. Maybe I’ll go again in another nine months. Even OAMC is still too much church for me. And anyway, if I went regularly people would take it for granted – I wouldn’t get such a big welcome!
I see benefits in going occasionally because otherwise, the longer it has been since I went, the more likely I would be to start making up things about it in my head (perhaps unintentionally). Going enables me to touch base with what it’s really like.
Comment by: Julie Marie
1Interesting you should post this today. Last week I got an email from my former pastor (not a personal email, it was a group email sent to everyone who gave their email address) saying not to miss next weekend, it will go down in history as the weekend everything changed.
I think that means the children’s center will open up, and I’m interested enough in that to go. Besides, my son asked if he could go to church last weekend.
I ran into an old church friend at the ice cream shop Sat. night — I know he knows we haven’t been going, because he works in my son’s Sunday school class, and of course, my son hasn’t been either. He was very warm and friendly; I ‘sensed’ he wanted to ask where we have been, but he didn’t, and I didn’t go there either. Anyways, it was nice to see him. It got me to thinking about some of the good things about my old church.
I think I will go next weekend. You make a really good point, Helen, about grounding yourself in reality.
Comment by: Bruce
2Helen, I was wondering how much OAMC is influenced by your personality, if at all. I’m a thorough going extrovert and can’t imagine OAMC. I love being with people. Are you an introvert or are you having social needs met through other groups? (Don’t mean to imply those are the only two choices.)
However, I am also a church planter and in the pre-time when we don’t actually have a church meeting regularly. So my wife and I have been visiting other churches. I do find the lack of close connections a deterent to wanting to be there regularly, i.e., weekly. I’d have to say that OAMC is more of a possibility in that context.
Comment by: Helen M.
3Julie Marie, if you go I hope you’ll find what I did – that you receive a warm welcome from those who know you.
Being there didn’t change my feelings about the content of the service but it does help me remember that these are good people who mean well and who are doing some things that MTWABP.
Comment by: Helen M.
4Bruce, I love being with people. Yes, I’m having my social needs met other ways. I said on the OAMC thread that actually, going to a church service is not a very social event. In the churches I’ve been in people have to be involved other ways for church to facilitate meaningful social connection.
Comment by: Bruce
5Hummmm. In an ideal world, what would make a church magnetic to you Helen?
My wife and I have settled on a small church whose people are genuinely warm and inviting. This is in contrast to one of the three large (currently) popular churches where I feel like I am a “project” for the welcomers standing by the door. And long forgotten by the time the service is over and we walk out alone. Groan.
Comment by: Keith
6Glad to hear it went ok, Helen
Comment by: Helen M.
7Thanks Keith.
Bruce, sorry – I forgot I hadn’t answered your question.
I like social get togethers and discussion groups. I suppose I prefer those to church because at church you’re supposed to do certain things and believe certain things. So church doesn’t have the openness I’d like.