Posted by Karen on: 07.30.2007 /
Hullo, everyone! I’m Karen, and I’ll be your guest host here at CatE this week.
Helen’s off enjoying sunny Italy with her extended family, and several other regulars are also on vacation. Meanwhile, I’ll be house sitting. Don’t worry, I’ve promised to vacuum, collect the empties and tidy up the joint before I go.
Helen’s very fortunate to be able to travel abroad. At least, that’s the perspective of someone (me) who was bitten by the travel bug way back when the highlight of my year was the family car trip.
No, things didn’t always go smoothly – to put it mildly. (You’d have to have known my parents to get the full implication of that statement.)
But I could overlook the squabbling, the disastrous “short cuts,” the car fires and breakdowns, and my cranky siblings if I could get out on the road, stare out the window at the wide open spaces and stop at every kitschy tourist trap and junk store along the highway.
But traveling’s just one of my favorite pastimes. I’m also a voracious reader and writer, a horse enthusiast (I ride once or twice a week), biker, compulsive walker, organic gardener, yoga practitioner, political junkie and a pop culture, movie and TV fan.
I didn’t pursue personal interests much while I was a conservative Christian because:
So, here’s your first assignment for the week:
Comment by: Rachel
1Hi, Karen! My favorite things to do in my free time are reading, blogging, gardening, watching social justice films with my movie club, and spending time with my husband and daughter and closest girlfriends. I also exercise three times a week but I don’t really consider that fun, just something I need to do and feel good about accomplishing.
I don’t seem to have much of an issue with balancing work/family with individual pursuits at these season on my life. I think that is probably because I work half days and I have one child who is 11 years old, so parenting is mostly guidance and quality time, but not caregiving tasks. Also I have had to adapt my life to a chronic health condition so my hobbies of reading, blogging and puttering in the yard fit with my physical limitations. Basically I have a lot of free time because I’m not able to keep a busy schedule (though I would if I could.)
I haven’t received negative messages at church about hobbies or leisure pursuits in general. Although the tradition I grew up in was “evangelical,” it did not fit the true definition of “fundamentalist” so I did not learn the extreme separatist mindset. There have always been church-sponsored activities like cooking classes, softball teams, scrapbooking clubs, etc. And the youth groups were always sponsoring activities like bowling, all-night skate parties, camping trips or whatever. I think the message, particularly to teens, was more “idle hands do the devil’s work” so keep busy, keep active, don’t lounge around and get into trouble.
The one area where I did get strong prohibitive messages was in regards to movies containing sex and violence. And I have developed a different standard for myself to determine a film’s value. In the monthly movie club I host, we look for films that with an important social message or that tell a story we feel needs to be told, regardless of whether there are honest depictions of sex or violence.
Comment by: Rachel
2Karen, you mentioned that in the conservative churches you attended certain hobbies were considered too materialistic or self-indulgent. Personally, I did not get that message from conservative evangelicalism. Actually there seemed to be very little examination or critique of economic issues. So as I have become more theologically and politically progressive, I have become MORE uncomfortable with materialistic hobbies, particularly if they involve collecting lots of expensive objects for accumulation or display. Not that I want to stand in judgment of other people’s choices – I can only make decisions for myself based on my own understanding of my religious faith.
Also in regards to the church youth group activities, I think that becoming more liberal has made me more of stick-in-the-mud there too. (he-he) I think that some of those all-night swim parties and such should be replaced with volunteering at a homeless shelter or doing an environmental clean-up project or participating in a rally for Darfur or things like that. I think teenagers could actually get really excited about those things, especially if they were doing them together with their friends. I want Christian kids to understand that following Jesus is a lifestyle, that working for justice and caring for creation and serving the needy are central to the Christian path. Those kids have a lot of energy – we need to put them to work!
Gee, I’m only 34 and I sound like an old fart already! :-)
Comment by: Keith
3Enjoy your week at the controls, Karen. I know we’re in good hands. Hobby-wise, I like sports and good television/movies. Been watching a lot of Coen bros. and Charlie Kaufman (sp?) movies lately. Also like reading Annie Dillard and writing – I’ve currently completed two essays going toward a book of essays I hope people will someday read (maybe Kinkos will publish it).
Karen, I don’t know if you take requests or not, but if you had the chance to start a discussion regarding church planting or community development that would be great. I would love to hear atheists’ perspectives on these practices, and especially value your input due to your experiences with John Perkins and others.
Comment by: Staci
4Very timely topic. I’ve been learning to take more time for the things I enjoy lately. My family is constantly working on our balancing act, though I don’t think we’re quite ready to take it on the road. Reading, photography, gardening, painting are some of my interests. The more I realize that I don’t have to be perfect at any of these activities, the more I enjoy them and want to share them with others. I’m actually enjoying my time at the gym now that I give myself permission to do the activities I want without having to be an expert or in perfect shape (and take time to visit the steam room afterwards.)
I’ve also learned to try hobbies that I wouldn’t have considered previously. My husband and son scuba dive. I had lots of rational and irrational reasons why I did not want to try it. But I really wanted to see what the fuss was about so I went for it. It was very challenging and I got a terrific sense of accomplishment upon certification. Plus, my son thought it was really cool since most of his friends’ moms wouldn’t do something like that. I still don’t go regularly like they do – no cold water for me.
Hm, I’ve never been to a church that had a big problem with any hobbies. Like Rachel, the churches I’ve attended have really emphasized keeping kids/teens busy. I think there is value in that and think it is great for kids to have a fun, safe place to be. We did have some disapproving looks when we had to miss church occasionally to go to one of my son’s sporting events. I’ve also felt pressure to go to church social events that I wasn’t interested in just to be “supportive and involved.” My guilt deflecting response: if people don’t go, I guess it isn’t something that needs to happen.
Comment by: Karen
5Rachel:
Well, good on ya for doing it anyway. I think the people who are most successful with exercising regularly are those who find a way to love doing it. Maybe playing tennis, joining a soccer team, or whatever.
I love the horseback – and that is quite a workout – but I find that I enjoy walking and biking a lot more since I got my iPod. I download things and wait to listen to them while I’m exercising, so it gives me an incentive to do it! :-)
That sounds more like the Presbyterian church I grew up in. It was definitely evangelical, but more accepting of “worldly” pursuits – like, um, scrapbooking… ;-)
Well, yes. I guess I wasn’t really thinking of youth group activities. My churches had those too, definitely. But those could double as fellowship and evangelism (where the kids were encouraged to invite their unsaved friends to attend, and a gospel message would be presented).
Sex doesn’t bother me at all anymore, in any context. Okay, maybe that’s the middle-aged female hormones talking. :-)
I do not like gratuitous violence in movies, however, or even “necessary” violence if it’s particularly graphic. I have opted out of seeing even well-reviewed films if I read that there’s a lot of gore and violence. I wouldn’t see Passion of the Christ for that reason, for instance.
Comment by: Karen
6See, my churches would not preach directly against materialist hobbies, but it was more of an indirect “store up your treasures in heaven” message that put off a definite negative vibe. Not to say everyone followed the ideal! There were always wealthy church members who had hobbies like collecting cars, or antiques or something like that.
In general, I find myself a lot more tolerant on these issues now. If people want to spend their money on collectibles, and it gives them a lot of enjoyment – more power to them. Many people get an appreciation for history and end up passing that along, as well as preserving beautiful things for posterity, when they’re collectors. Not my bag, necessarily, but – it doesn’t bother me.
The one area where I still find myself put off is that of “foodies.” Goodness knows I enjoy great food and trying new restaurants, but I’ve read about people who really, really take it to the extreme. Like traveling all over the world to eat at certain places, and spending mega-bucks on special gourmet meals.
I do have to wonder whether they think about all the people who go hungry, and all the food inequity in the world? I guess I just don’t see the redeeming value in such an individual, transient experience. Though I guess it keeps the restaurant industry going, and maybe helps particular chefs become successful …
My last church was really good about that. The youth group focused a lot on outreach events rather than so much on socials.
Lighten up, woman! :-)
Comment by: Karen
7Keith:
I love all those guys. Adaptation is one of my favorite movies of all time. :-)
So cool! I had no idea you were writing a book – that’s wonderful!!
I haven’t ever read anything by Annie Dillard, but I just happened to hear her interviewed over the weekend on NPR and she is a real trip. I definitely want to read something of hers now. She’s got a new book out… Is there a particular title you’d recommend?
Of course, I’ll take requests. :-) What particular aspect of CCD would you be interested in discussing, Keith?
Comment by: Karen
8Wow – a movie club. That sounds like a great idea. How does it work?
I remember your mentioning your health condition before. I hope it doesn’t put too much of a damper on the things you enjoy doing, Rachel.
That sounds like the Presbyterian church I grew up in. Definitely evangelical, but much more tolerant of “worldy” pursuits like, um, scrapbooking … ;-)
Right. Plus those activities doubled as both fellowship and opportunities for evangelism.
I was thinking more of adult pursuits that take up a fairly substantial amount of time and money just for the fun of it. Those were the things that weren’t prohibited, of course, but not admired very much in churches I attended.
Movie sex doesn’t bother me at all anymore. That could be the middle-aged female hormones talking, of course. (hee, hee)
Gore and gratuitous violence really upsets me, and I won’t see even otherwise well-reviewed movies that include that. I wouldn’t see Passion of the Christ for that reason, for instance.
Comment by: Karen
9Staci:
That’s such an important point! We do tend to get intimidated about trying new things (or I do), especially after a certain age. It’s like kids are used to not being good at all kinds of things, so they’re not worried about being beginners. But somehow we get older and we’ve got to be “experts” or else we won’t do things!
That’s so sad, to me. I’m really aware of that impulse and I try to recognize it and squash it anytime it rears up. I see so many people my age (mid-40s) who won’t do new things, and I just think it’s a shame they are missing out on what could be great new pursuits that bring them a lot of joy.
Good on you for trying the scuba! that’s really stretching yourself – terrific.
Yes, that’s something I can really relate to, the pressure to attend church events was overwhelming in my churches. After you’re already devoting most of the day Sunday to worship, several weeknights to small group, bible study, choir and committeee meetings and Saturday mornings to ministry, to be chastised because you missed the Friday night picnic was galling. Grrrrr …
I like your guilt-deflecting mechanism! :-)
Comment by: Staci
10Yes, the guilt-deflecting mechanism is like Wonder Woman’s bracelets – attractive, useful, and effective.
Comment by: Kathleen
11Being a college student, I really do spend quite a bit of time (probably far too much) just “hanging out” – watching tv, listening to music, sitting around the house with my roommates. More relevant to the question, though, I like to read, I crochet a little, I do Judo, and I’m trying to get back into working out (when I’m in good shape, it’s enjoyable enough that it could be considered a hobby. when I’m out of shape like now, it’s more of a chore).
Crocheting is something that I usually do, unless I have a deadline to meet or am experimenting with something fancy, just to keep my hands busy while I’m doing something else, like watching tv or doing class readings that are posted online (I made almost an entire blanket one semester strictly while doing homework for 2 classes that had a lot of readings posted online. I gave it to my baby cousin. I sometimes wonder whether he’s learning about Linguistics and the history of modern Ireland while he sleeps). Reading I don’t do as much as I like to lately, though the past few weeks have been better, because I’m babysitting this summer, and I can read while the kid naps (I can also nap while the kid naps, so sometimes I don’t get much reading done!)
Judo is the only one of these that actually takes a good deal of money and of time. I’ve never had a problem fitting it in before, but this summer it’s been a hassle – I have to go home almost every weekend for family obligations, so I can’t get to Friday night classes. I work a ten or eleven hour day on Wednesdays, and I get off at 7:30 – which is exactly when class starts, so I have to rush and be a little late in any case, but as often as not I’m just too exhausted.
I’ve never heard my church express any negative opinions towards hobbies or enjoying your leisure time – heck, most of the priests I know like to golf, and my dad has season tickets to Giants games in a row with a couple of priests and a deacon! I suppose, if you get down to the bare bones of it, there are more self-less, charitable things I could be doing with my 3 nights a week and the $40 a semester Judo costs me (of course, that’s really next to nothing. When I’m not longer a student, the question will be whether there are better or more important things for me to do with my $80 a month, and at that point the answer might be yes). At this point in my life, though, it serves its purpose physically (because most other exercise is a chore), mentally (because college students live in a bubble, and I didn’t realize it explicitly until well after I’d started, but the opportunity to interact with people who aren’t 18-24 is pretty important), and emotionally (because when you’re having your face ground into the mat by a 6’2″ guy who weighs well more than twice what you do, you can’t think about your problems with school or your roommates or your parents, and that’s a really crucial respite when you’re stressed).
Comment by: joe
12Spare time? What is that?
When I’m not working and/or wasting time on the internet, I seem to spend most of my time on family things.
And I actually think that church doesn’t help in a whole number of ways – for example, busy people are often made even busier by church related activities. In fact, rather than encouraging people to slow down, take a paycut and a lifestyle change, spend time with their kids rather than becoming the ‘pillar’ of their local community we seem to grind people into the ground.
Comment by: Stephan
13Most of my hobbies revolve around family since I have an 11-year-old son and twin 8-year-old daughters. My son just finished his baseball season for the summer and one daughter played softball. I spent a great deal of time coaching or watching those activities. I also play softball, and that season just ended. I take the bus to work and often read, mostly non-fiction. My wife and I are musicians and play multiple instruments, so we spend a lot of time on that. We play board games, tennis, kickball in the yard.
I’ve never attended a church that took any sort of stance on hobbies. As several have stated above, I sort of wish churches would spend more time and energy helping people get into some good hobbies – volunteering, helping and such.
Comment by: Rachel
14Well Karen, since you asked…The movie club has a bit of a tie-in with my hosting duties at Justice and Compassion. I host a movie night at my house once a month with several of my girlfriends, including the lovely and talented Staci who posted a few comments ago. There are six of us in the group but we usually have four or five on a given night. We watch films with social justice themes, chosen based on suggestions from the group. We have a potluck dinner – always yummy! – and eat while we watch the movie. Then after the movie, we discuss it and I take notes on what everyone says. Then I write a movie review for the blog based on everyone’s comments.
Our hope is that some of our Justice and Compassion bloggers will choose to watch the same movies and then discuss them with us online when the review is posted. We always have a date and link for the next film in the sidebar on Justice and Compassion. The August movie will be Sophie Scholl: The Final Days. I saw this movie in the new release section at Blockbuster so hopefully that will make it easier for people, since the last couple of movies I reviewed were a bit difficult to obtain. Benjamin and Megan occasionally do reviews also and those are always posted in the sidebar in advance as well. So anyhow, let me extend an open invitation to anyone who wants to join our virtual film club.
Here are a couple of the past reviews from my movie group:
Why We Fight
Tsotsi
And here is an excellent movie review by the lovely and talented Megan Ady:
Water
Comment by: Steve S.
15I love people, ideas, and competition, probably in that order. So I love to hang out with people, reading/listening/asking/thinking/writing/dialogue, and opportunities to compete (right now this is fed primarily by my neighbor Asa who is a board game nut!)
My job is harder, my family is easy. I (attempt to) put God first in everything, so that is an easy way for me to prioritize things (will this activity produce results that matter in a hundred years?) which means that the only things that are really important are what happens inside of me, in my relationships with others, and in my relationship to God.
Most of what I do as ‘hobby’ is something that I do with my family. Work could be that way to, but it requires that I approach my work with the proper frame of reference, we are still working on that!
Weeellllll …the church I go to doesn’t really divy it up like that. If we are doing something that ‘isn’t related to our spirituality’ then that is a sign that we are either mistunderstanding the nature of our spirituality, or misunderstanding the nature of our activities, or we are in error (see next question).
Anything that damages or encourages others to damage God’s creation or God’s creatures.
Comment by: Karen
16Cool. I used to love knitting, needlepoint, crocheting, etc. but unfortunately spending so much time on the computer (for work) has given me aches and pains in my arms and hands and they need to rest when I’m not working.
It sounds really fun, though. I do kickboxing but I’ve never tried Judo.
From what I’ve gathered, Catholics (assuming you’re a Catholic?) tend to be more leisure-friendly. I mean, there’s all that bingo, and my husband talks about how all the priests he knew growing up liked to nip a little wine or have a cocktail when they visited his family. :-) That wouldn’t have happened with my pastors – no way!
I think when it comes to exercise, that has to be a priority just because it’s known to be so vital to good health. My feeling is that I want to be alive as long as possible (though my genetic history isn’t good) both for me and for my family. And I can’t do much good for others if I’m ill, either.
When you do find some exercise that you enjoy, you’re much more likely to do it consistently, of course. So, for the modest financial commitment that you described, I’d say Judo sounds like an excellent choice.
Comment by: Karen
17That does seem to often be the case, unfortunately.
Comment by: Karen
18Our kids are very athletic and I cannot begin to total up the hours we’ve spent at practices and games over the years. Neither my husband nor I coached, but we volunteered in other ways for their soccer, baseball and basketball leagues.
I’m not a big sports fan in general (my husband is) but I wouldn’t have traded those years in the stands watching the boys play for anything. Really fun and of course wonderful memories. :-)
I’m sort of surprised no one’s mentioned following professional sports. My husband and his family members are extremely devoted sports fans: they watch all the games on TV, go to a lot of games during the season, and talk about their favorite players and teams incessantly.
I can only take listening to so much of it at family reunions, on vacations, etc. It gets so tiresome for me, but they love it!
Comment by: Karen
19We must have gone to the same kinds of churches, Steve S. That’s how I would describe the teaching I got as well.
For instance, I never would have taken up horseback before, even though it is something I really dreamed of doing my whole life. But because it is relatively costly and time-consuming, and it’s purely for my own enjoyment and challenge, I would have considered that way too self-indulgent – even though I work very hard and have reached a place in my career where I do have the resources to manage it.
It just wouldn’t have been an option for me in my Christian tradition.
Comment by: David H
20Favorite things to do with free time: I love to read, but don’t get to do it near as much any more. I like to write poetry, but that is largely for my own enjoyment (self therapy) and is likewise constrained by available time. I am a huge fan of movies (all kinds, but especially horror/ghost movies). Is it strange a pacifist would love George Romero living dead flicks? I just finished watching the Tour de France, the only major sporting event I refuse to miss each year. I love to ride bicycle, but since being attacked by a dog while biking I do most of my riding without leaving the house. I do enjoy pro football and like to discuss all that is happening with that sport, especially the Pittsburgh Steelers. Likewise, I am a huge fan of Penn State athletics, not because I went there but because my friends allowed me to adopt their team because Temple University (an alma mater) has little of worth on the collegiate athletic level. I coached my youngest daughter’s soccer team for the last two years and found that one of the most rewarding experiences of my life. I am fairly athletic (running, biking swimming, basketball) but always had lousy coaches (maybe because I wasn’t a star). It felt good to try and push every kid beyond what they felt they could do and it was joyous to see them succeed.
Balance individual activities and hobbies: Coaching soccer made that easier. I got to exercise and I got to spend time with my kids (I brought my older daughter to most practices and made her an assistant coach). Many of the other things I like to do are more difficult to balance. My kids will watch the tour with me and we get to talk about it and they sometimes ride with me, but most of the other things I like to do are largely solitary. Writing and reading require time and concentration. I do still sacrifice some of my own reading time to read to my kids, though. I try to make it like acting, complete with dramatic voices and sound effects. I’m not sure what it says that my 13-year-old will occasionally ask me to read part of a book to her. They really like it when I do Harry Potter because there are so many characters and it becomes a game to try and remember each and every voice.
The churches I was raised it had a relatively free, but highly dysfunctional regard to activities. You could pursue almost any interest or activity without much fear of criticism (except maybe bars and strip clubs) but they were seldom focused on in a constructive way. You had church ministries and then you had your own interests. There seemed little cross over, but you were OK as long as you made sure to put in some effort on the ministry front. The two church hobbies that truly struck me as messed up were softball and basketball. Our church had two teams for each that competed in a league. One of the teams for each had all of the good players. The other team had anyone else. If someone new came to church who was very talented, then they would actually take one of the lesser talents off the good team roster and send them down to the “other” team. That sent a strong message to me about winning being the most important aspect of something that should have arguably been a ministry. Also, sportsmanship was often in short supply at church league games. I remember playing against the Youth for Christ team at their rec center and seeing the director of YFC get pulled aside because he had lost it and was cursing out the players on our team.
The other issue with balance has been that my upbringing taught me that church activities (especially ministry related) always outweighed anything — including family. At a certain age I realized that was not only false, but also unhealthy. Still, I have difficulty figuring out where the balance should be because my tendency is to err on the side of my family.
I’m not sure I find any hobbies offensive or objectionable. Wife swapping and porn-surfing probably don’t qualify as hobbies (both seem to fit the above stated qualities). There are many activities that have little interest for me (watching NASCAR as just one example), but the how and the why of the hobby — not the hobby itself — seems most important in determining if the hobby has value.
Comment by: Steve S.
21Karen,
I guess I didn’t communicate very clearly…
The Church would say that horseback riding when truly understood, and ministry/evangelism/spirituality when truly understood, are, not only, not mutually exclusive, but actually (in your case) identical.
The error part would be if we tried to convince ourselves that we were ‘doing ministry’ by shooting dope with addicts…
Comment by: Karen
22Yep, I can see where that might be considered to be “in error.” ;-)
Comment by: Karen
23Yes, passions tend to heat up on the sports field, no matter who’s playing, I guess.
As I mentioned, my boys are both very athletic and competitive. Have been literally since they were born, so I’m thinking there might even be a genetic component to that trait.
Anyway, I once signed them up for a church youth basketball league where the idea was just to have fun and not compete. So they didn’t have real referees, they had junior high kids doing the ref’ing, and they kept score but didn’t keep season stats.
My kids were probably 6 and 8 and they absolutely hated it. They wound up on the floor, crying, just about every game: “I got fouled! Why didn’t they call a foul?! That’s not fair!!”
My husband said, “Y’know, they’re right. They want to play by the rules, and this league is trying to run a competitive sport without proper rules, and that’s not fun or even safe.”
So the next season I signed them up for basketball at the local YMCA and they just loved it. They had real adult refs, who called fouls, and stats and playoffs and championships, and that was so much more enjoyable for my competitive kids.
Comment by: David H
24I think the bigger problem in our church leagues was the unstated belief that as Christians everyone would play fair. Go figure, that didn’t work out so well.
Comment by: Stephan
25In the church league in which I play I think we all hope everyone will bring their Christian walk onto the field, but we also know everyone has weaknesses. The problem comes when we expect Christians to be better than everyone else. They might be a little bit better behaved, but we all lose it sometimes.
My problem has been more with parents in my son’s league who push it too far. I hate hearing adults yell at kids, and, for the most part, the kids know when they screw up. You don’t have to rub it in by yelling at them. I have always tried to coach by encouraging their strengths and urging them to cheer for their team and not against the other team.
Comment by: David H
26I have had some such parents of children that I coached. Once a parent called to ask me how they could push their kid harder. They were already pushing them way to hard. I spent 45 minutes talking to the Dad about how to push himself harder as a father, all the while trying not to say anything that would tick him off.
Likewise, I repeat to my kids during the season that they are not permitted to say anything bad about teammates or kids on the other team. It has been a joy to see how kids use that once they know it is for real.
Comment by: Karen
27Oh boy. I’ve seen some really ugly examples of this, from dads and moms and coaches alike (though it does tend to be men more often than women, in my experience).
There were two dads in Little League who actually crossed the line into what I’d call verbal abuse of their own sons. What was interesting is that when it got really bad, some of the other parents in the stands would chastise the dads doing the damage. Like, “Hey S., lighten up, he’s doing his best!”
Really sad situation, and of course the kids have grown up with poor self-esteem and lots of problems as teenagers. :-(
That’s the way to go, definitely.
Comment by: Doreen A Mannion
28David H and Karen wrote:
I had some horrendous experiences as the only female basketball coach in boys leagues. Boys were ranked by ability in the computer by the time they were 9 years old!
EX 1 – We beat a team and afterwards, the other coach was in the hall berating his players. The next practice, he brought 8 dresses and made each player wear one. NOTHING happened to this coach.
EX 2 – Especially in the playoffs, coaches would claim they needed to reschedule a game. They then would not call the “lowest” ability player(s) on the team to tell them when/where the game was.
EX 3 – Coaches frequently telling players that they “play like girls.”
EX 4 – Coaches, and therefore their players, refusing to shake hands with me after the game, usually after being “beaten” by a woman.
EX 5 – Playoff game, the other coach brings in the older brother of one of his players and tries to pass him off as a “real” player.
Yes, they hated me. But I loved it. Not because I won. Because I know they hated me because we won.
It’s not rocket science. Make it fun. Let the not so good players play with the better players (other coaches would “throw” one quarter by putting all the lower skilled ones in at the same time). Find what each player can do well and don’t try to make him do something well he’s not made for. Don’t draft kids who have screaming parents. Don’t draft kids who are mean to other kids during tryouts.
Ah, I miss those days sometimes…it’s actually why I joined myspace. Many of my friends on there are kids I coached more than 5 years ago.
Comment by: Keith
29Karen,
Sorry it’s taken awhile to reply. Anything by Dillard is good, IMO, I especially liked “Holy the Firm.” It was the first work of hers I read, so is probably the most meaningful. “Pilgrim at Tinker Creek” won a Pulitzer (it was her second piece of writing in her life – she was 27 when she won the award), and is very good. She says that “The Writing Life” was a mistake and she doesn’t care for it, but I still enjoy it. So there’s a few leads.
As far as CCD goes, please share how your perspective on CCD has changed since you became an atheist and how it has remained the same. In your opinion, how can Christian community development be most beneficial and least harmful? I’m also curious whether CCD shed positive or negative light on Christians in the opinion of other atheists besides yourself.
BTW, my wife’s and my favorite Kaufman movie is Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind … best movie on the subject of romantic love/commitment I’ve ever seen. Loved the concept of Adapatation also.
Keep up the good work. Thanks.
Comment by: Karen
30Oh, Doreen!! That is just terrible – I never saw anything that bad going on, never.
Was this in a local chapter of a national sports youth organization? If so, I can’t imagine that the higher-ups in the organization would tolerate that kind of behavior if it was brought to their attention.
We did have a woman manager one year for Little League in our district where no other women act as coaches and managers – it’s all men. She was outwardly treated respectfully, but she told me privately she felt the other managers took advantage of her gender and relative inexperience (she only managed one season) to pull some “fast ones” on her.
Nothing as heinous as what you’re describing though; that’s awful.
Comment by: Karen
31Keith, I’ll put those books on my reading list, thanks! She has a brand-new one out that was the subject of the interview I heard with her.
I saw Eternal Sunshine once and always meant to watch it again. I liked it, but was sort of confused. I think if I get it again I’ll probably appreciate it more. ;-)
Thanks for your suggestions on the CCDA. I’ll do that.