Posted by Helen on: 08.08.2007 /
I find going where the first language is not my language to be a humbling experience.
Suddenly I don’t have something I usually take for granted - the ability to communicate easily and naturally through words, in simple or complex, perhaps nuanced, ways. Little children can do it and I can’t. I feel like I should do my best to use their language rather than expect people to talk to me in English. I made some effort to learn a little Italian before we went. Even so, my Italian was so limited I gratefully accepted the help when the person I was communicating with switched to English. Invariably their English was better than my Italian.
I still have gestures and smiles no matter what the spoken language is, which helps a bit. Nevertheless, it’s very hard to communicate any specific content with those (except when I what I want can be pointed at). The chef at our villa was very friendly. She also spoke no English at all. My uncle was best at Italian out of all of us and he was able to understand she was especially taken with his adopted Cambodian son because she has an adopted son from Guatamala. She had enthusiastically showed me the photo but all I picked up was “I have a son too”. Communication is so much more rich and interesting when I can understand the details.
There’s also the cultural uncertainty; am I unwittingly violating a custom or using a word inappropriately? The Italians seemed to be a relatively laid-back people; I don’t think they would care so much about this as some cultures. And also, in a vacation context it’s less serious than when a business deal is on the line.
I think all these things apply - maybe in a smaller, more subtle way - when a Christian and a person who isn’t a Christian attempt to talk with each other. At least one person has to make the effort to understand the other’s language (and culture) in order for them to communicate. Perhaps one person needs to go the extra mile and speak in the other person’s language. I sometimes feel that some Christians approach dialog with people who aren’t Christians like an English speaker who goes to Europe and expects to continue using English even though that’s not the native language of the people they’re with.
We’ve discussed Christianese on this blog before. I learned it, got good at a few dialects of it, and then made the decision to stop using it when it didn’t reflect my convictions any more. When I see Christians speaking or writing it to people who aren’t Christians, I wonder why they would put up a language barrier like that. If I could have spoken Italian with any degree of competence when I was in Italy, there’s no way I would have used English! Isn’t the goal of communication to be understood? Why not make every effort to facilitate that?
Perhaps the reason is, these Christianese speakers don’t know English. Why not learn it? It’s way easier to learn (or re-learn for those who used to be fluent) than a non-English language. Hey maybe churches whose members speak Christianese could offer ‘English as a second language’ as part of their education curriculum.
Comment by: Steve S.
1It all depends on the church you were a part of!
Some churches are so old and traditional that they predate ‘christianese’ others are so full of people who are either a part of the non-christian culture or are attempting to engage it that they eschew christianese; however, most churches use it without being aware of it (unfortunately).
The crazy thing about it is that much christianese is simply embedded in our cultural subconscious.
The worldview of our culture and the worldview of the Western Church are hopelessly entangled. This causes communication problems in all directions.
For this reason, in our church, we end up trying to explain everything without christianese as well as challenging the typical understanding of common christian terminology.
Comment by: Benjamin ady
2Helen
welcome back. glad you had a nice time in Italy.
Of course it is also true that there are lots of christians out here speaking English, and doing it rather well. Jim Henderson springs to mind. And Off-The-Map is kind of a “English as a second language for Christians” type of organization, isn’t it?
and perhaps I am something like a 3rd culture kid–I can’t kind of get inside the head of both languages, and perhaps do a little translating.
On another languagish note, I recently learned the term “moonbat“, and decided I must be one.
Comment by: Eliza
3We had a discussion on the topic A Christian Language? in August 2006, on this site, in case anyone is interested in looking back to the comments in that thread…
Comment by: seekingsomething
4I love learning new languages and have happily reached a time in my life where I feel confident to launch into conversation in ‘foreign’ countries and make mistakes and laugh them off and feel ‘fluent’ in a new language just because I’ve successfully ordered a gin and tonic in Polish or Czech on the first night of a holiday… :)
I feel acutely aware that my use of language has changed since I stopped being a Christian. Back then, I remember that we would all at times grumble or laugh at various other groups of Christians for the way THEY used language but it’s actually only since I’ve left the Church that I’ve realised how my own language was so totally alien to the rest of the people with whom I interact.
I feel a real sense of freedom now that I’ve stopped being a Christian. As well eradicating a few weird words from my vocabulary, my language has become more active, direct and assertive. I talk freely now about what I want to happen, what I would love to achieve, what I choose to do, what I don’t believe and what I won’t engage with anymore. Whereas before I just hoped and waited and worried about whether Christians should really say the things I was thinking and feeling….
I’m not sure whether the change is a just a consequence of becoming someone who is no longer a Christian or whether the change might have occured anyway as I’ve become older and more confident.
But I feel deliciously free now to have wants and desires (instead of simply hoping… God Willing) and it feels really good. I love to make choices (without guilt)about which invitations I accept or decline. I feel like I’ve swapped the Christian mini-phrase book, for a whole dictionary of new expressions :)
Comment by: Karen
5seekingsomething:
I’ve wondered the same thing! I think in my case it’s a bit of both influences.
That’s so great. Your description made me smile - and I can totally relate. ;-)
Comment by: Steve S.
6That really makes me sad!
How did the freedom of life in God’s enormous universe of goodness get transformed into something so cramped as what you describe of your ‘christian’ experience?
How do people read the gospels and come away thinking, “We better make sure everyone knows just the right thing to think, and doesn’t speak out of line!” ????!!!!!?!?!?!?!
I guess it makes me a little mad too!
Comment by: Helen
7Steve S, I’m glad your church makes an effort to avoid language that people who aren’t Christians wouldn’t know.
Eliza, thanks for the link. That was a good discussion!
Hi Benjamin, yes, I agree Christianese is not spoken a lot around Off The Map. Like you I think I’m bilingual. Hmmm…this brought to mind another thing I should confess. I’ll add it to the comments on that post.
ss, I love trying out other languages too; it’s like magic when it works! But I also find it humbling that I am so inept in them. As for growing more confident, I think that is partly something which comes with age. But presumably, deciding not to acquiesce to restrictive systems helps too.
From Steve’s comment
Steve I shared my perspective, which is that I am more free now than when I was a Christian, in The Heart of the Matter
Comment by: seekingsomething
8Helen said (in the linked post)
Thank you for the reminder of that post Helen. I especially like the bit above.
Comment by: sarah’s journal » Blog Archive » Quotable
9 01/12/08 10:31 AM | Comment Link |[...] “I sometimes feel that some Christians approach dialog with people who aren’t Christians like an English speaker who goes to Europe and expects to continue using English, even though that’s not the native language of the people they’re with.” – Helen, “Conversation At The Edge” [...]